At this point, it’s not breaking news that Dick Ankiel shaved off his upper lip fur. It is breaking news, however, that we need to pay the proper respect to his stache. When that happens, we call in the American Mustache Institute from the bullpen to mop up the mess.

In memory of the upper lip squirrel passing, the American Mustache Institute coordinated a candlelight vigil Tuesday night along the Mississippi River underneath the world’s largest mustache — St. Louis’ Gateway Arch.

During the ceremony, AMI’s chief executive officer, Dr. Abraham J. Froman, was clearly shaken.

“We salute Mr. Ankiel for having the gumption and good looks required to grow a high quality lip canvas when many said he couldn’t,” said Dr. Froman. “Sadly, his actions have disappointed us all, most notably, his upper lip. Now, his mouth brow is gone and there’s a void above his lip and in the hearts of the Mustached American community everywhere.”

For more, see here.

God speed, Dick-stache.

Tags: Dick Ankiel, Mustache

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 29th, 2009 at 1:37 pm and is filed under St. Louis Cardinals. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.